Mixed Hope
by just-a-shadow-of-death
Summary: Over the years, Hope starts having mixed feeling about Snow. This Christmas, he is here to let it all out.   Hope being dominant and a uke Snow. don't like don't read. R&R


**Okay. I know it's not x-mas but who cares. I don't.**

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><p>It was that time of year, where everyone got together and wasted money on other people besides themselves. Serah was busy decorating the house inside and told Snow to go out and put up lights. Like seriously, was anyone going to come? Last year, Lightning had decided she had something to do and hadn't bothered to show up. It was Christmas, who missed Christmas with their families? Vanille and Fang had also not shown up and then there was Hope, who's last year in high school kept him from making it here. The only people who had shown up were Sazh and Dajh.<p>

Snow rose from the sofa and pulled over his coat lazily, "Is it really necessary to put these up?" He wrapped his scarf around him and peaked out the window. Serah stopped hanging some stuff and looked back at him sternly.

"Yes. It's necessary." She said, returning to her work.

There were only three days left and Snow could hold off of working for so long. He rolled his eyes and carried the lights outside. The cold breeze stunned him, forcing him to hug his coat closer to himself. "Shhesh.!" He muttered, showing obvious frustration in working on something that wasn't going to be seen by anyone. There were living in a freaking forest, no one was going to come here and look at the little house they had.

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><p>"Here!" Serah gave him a hot cup of tea. She smiled and sat right next to him, pulling away strands of hair that stuck on his forehead from the wet snow that had landed on him.<p>

"Thanks." Snow muttered.

Serah kept smiling and was excited. Snow furrowed his brows and looked at her accusingly. "Why are you smiling so much?"

Serah, ever so excited clapped her hands and almost screamed in his ear, "Vanille and Fang called."

He was surprised, he hadn't seen Fang and Vanille for two years, not since the last time they had spent in this house since Lightning had saved them. "That's great." Snow said, a little happy for the two and glad that someone other than Sazh and Dajh were going to show up. "Actually it's better than great." He said. "I'm really excited to see them again."

"I know right?" Serah agreed, "Even Hope called. He finished High school and will be visiting before he goes off to a university!"

"Great!" Snow raised his eyebrows. "That kid really doesn't like me." He added.

Serah looked at him questioningly, "But you two were good when Vanille and Fang visited. Did something happen?" She put a hand over Snow's shoulder, "Did something happen?"

Snow sipped his tea, "Yeah well, he's still angry." Snow looked around for the remote, "remote?"

She looked over her shoulder and gave him the remote, "I thought everything was alright between you two. That's what you told me." She watched as Snow make a frown and turn on the TV. "Did you say something to him? Maybe you did and you didn't realize it."

He shook his head, "No I'm pretty sure I didn't say anything. And I also don't want to talk about him." He licked his lips, "Hey, Did Lightning called?" He quickly changed the subjects and thankfully he realized it was the right question to ask because Serah let out an exasperated sigh.

"No." She said sternly, "She said she is busy and had some work to do." She stood up, "Can you believe it? Our friends are going to show up but not our family. This was going to be the best Christmas ever and she Claire decides there are better things to do then visit us at least once.

"Yup!" Snow said, "She's awkward like that."

"What?"

"Forget it." Snow stood up. "Don't beat yourself over it." He shut of the TV, there was nothing on. "She will be the one who misses 'the best Christmas'" He kissed her on the cheek. "Don't worry, she'll show up someday."

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><p>He quickly took a hot shower, he had overslept and while he was sleeping. Fang, Vanille and Hope had come over. He quickly pulled on a sweater and wiped his hair, which stacked all over the places and made his way down stairs.<p>

The first person he saw out of the three was Vanille, she was standing right in front of the first few steps and he smiled. "So nice to see you." He hugged her. She smiled at him, still the same old person he had known a long time ago.

"How are you? Big boy." Fang asked, and Snow realized how fatigue Fang looked. She came over and gave him light hug and winked at him.

"I'm great." He said, pulling a hand over his wet head and giving a little nervous laugh.

"Snow." Serah said, "Say hi to Hope." _She had to bring him up_. Snow looked past the two ladies and watched Hope sitting down ignoring them. He was, he looked, he was older. To put it in words, he looked grown up.

"Hi." He said walking over to him. Vanille, Fang and Serah started talking and he was momentarily forgotten. "Hi," he said again waving his hand. Hope looked up at him, made a face and stood up.

Hope had grown, was tall and looked more mature, Snow wondered if he really was, behaving like a child. "Hello." He said, voice much deeper then Snow remembered. He raised his hand for a hand shake and Snow took it. The first thing he realized about Hope was that his hands were much rougher and that his grip was stronger. Whether Hope was squeezing his hands on purpose to inflict hurt, he didn't know, but Hope did manage to give him a death glare before sitting back down.

Snow looked at him intently and turned around, _'that was weird'_ he went back to where the girls were discussing amongst themselves.

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><p>Hope walked into the kitchen where Serah was cooking and stood right next to her. He smiled at her, "You don't have to cook for me. I'm not hungry." He told her.<p>

Serah shook her head, "Ah ah, I'm cooking and all three of you are going to eat. No matter what."

"Seriously, I ate on my way here." He said again.

"I don't care how much you ate. You are still going to eat."

Hope laughed and went over to the fridge, "Whatever you say. Hey can I take a drink?" He asked, once he saw her nod, he took out a can of soda.

He left the place immediately, there was nothing to do in here. There was a reason why he never wanted to show up here or look at them. He wasn't going to visit them this year either, but Vanille had forced him to come. And then there was pressure from his father too.

Walking into the living room, he saw Snow sitting on the sofa and the man quickly looked up at him, not even smile but a glance. This man had ruined his life! First he had let go of his mother and then he occupied his mind day and night for the past few years. He scowled at him and walked off.

There was another reason why he had came over and he it wasn't because he felt jolly or happy because it was Christmas. He was old enough, he knew it was now or never. He was going to be true to himself and no-one else anymore.

Snow, the man he loathed so much had turned into so much more. He had always thought of getting revenge, beating the man, force him to ask forgiveness, but those thoughts had quickly disappeared and something else had taken over its place completely, and Hope hated him for that.

Hope had developed a crush on the blonde man. He hated him so much, that he had started to like him. However it worked out. He cursed himself and sat on the stairs. "This is ridicules." He couldn't even look the man in the eye. He felt nervous and angry, instead of showing feelings, he wanted to punch him instead.

He snapped open the soda can and sipped it. He was here for one thing and that was for himself. He wanted to prove to himself that his little crush was nothing but a mistake and meeting the loser hero again would make him remember that.

And as if talking about him wasn't enough, he watched him turn a corner and walk towards him. He sighed and again furrowed his eyebrows.

"What's the matter with you?" Snow asked. He sat right next to Hope, who fidgeted away from him.

Hope nervously looked over his shoulder, "Nothing." He got up from where he stood and took a step up the stairs.

Snow got up too, "Look." He said, desperate. "I don't know what you are mad at." He face him, a little scrap of sadness in his voice. "I'm not sure what I did. But I am sorry." He patted him on his shoulder. "I'm really sorry."

Hope nervously swallowed and the hand on his shoulder sent a speck of heat towards his face. He was sure he muttered a 'no' but it didn't voice right, so he cleared his throat.

This bastard, after staying away from him, hating him and those thoughts about him. He hated him for it and now here he was, making it much worse. He shrugged his arm away from Snow and walked upstairs quickly. His breathing coming in slowly. After so many years of denial and hate, he was here and following him. He turned our and spat at him, "Stop following me." He spoke through cringed teeth, desperately showing anger so the idiot won't follow.

Snow didn't stop. "Why? Am I bothering you that much?" He asked walking up after him slowly.

The young man ignored him and walked towards the guest room, where he was staying for the week. At the corner of his eye, he watched Snow follow him. Half of him wanted to hit him, the other half eagerly wanting him to come inside to his room.

He opened the door and went in and Snow also came inside the small room. "Okay, look." Snow began, talking behind Hope who had his eyes closed. "I know you are mad, but I'd like to know why. Because I'm pretty sure you forgave me…"

Hope bit his lip and breathed in a harsh breath. They were alone, Snow was running his mouth and he had thought of a way to express himself. After so many nights of dreaming and thinking of a way to confess himself towards the other, he had thought of only one thing. And he was about to do it.

He turned around and stampeded towards Snow. Snow thankfully stopped talking, bit his lip and nervously backed away. Hope knew how big he had gotten, in high school he was the biggest and strongest jock available and seeing Snow in sudden uneasiness made it blissful.

"You talk too much." He breathed, knowing how frustrated and angry his voice sounded, though he was glad he sounded that way because Snow became anxious and walked towards the door.

"Okay." Snow said. "You are obviously angry and…."

Hope didn't care the way he handled this but he did. He pulled Snow by the arm and forced his lips on to the older man. Pressuring him and biting his lip, he clashed his teeth against the other man and kissed him.

Snow pulled away harshly. Half out of breath and confusion and half out of anger. "What the hell?" he asked. The sudden shock of it all hit him, "What the hell do you think you are doing?" He asked and moved in towards Hope.

The young boy wasn't ashamed, he did what he wanted and got it.

Snow shamefully wiped his lips and gazed at him angrily. "Answer me?" he asked as he watched the boy sit in bed and not say anything. He was ignoring him and looked downright annoying right now. His hands shook in desperation and he walked closer to Hope, who was taking this seriously. "What's wrong with you?" He tried again.

He guessed he should say something, but why should he? It wasn't his fault, it was this man's fault. Who was looking at him with uttered confusion and shock. Hope kind of felt bad for him but then again, he still didn't care.

"Hope?"

"Get out." He finally spoke. Looking Snow straight in the eyes. He was nervous and a little scared of the consequences but there was nothing he could do. "I don't want to see you." He said and walked into Snow's personal space.

Snow stood there stunned. _When had Hope turned into such a prick?_ Why was he getting nervous and anxious around this boy who was nothing but a cry baby a few years ago. Snow shrugged and backed away, "You are confused right now."

"Yeah, I think I am." Hope agreed. Sounding of like a bastard, he felt a little bad though. Snow looked hurt and panicked and he was there making it even worse.

The older man just gazed at him and nodded, "Just cool of a bit." He said and walked out the room a little too quickly.

Hope shrugged and threw himself over the bed. He had dreamt of that so many times, but there were something's that he just didn't understand. "Maybe next him." He said out loud. "Next time will be better."

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><p><strong>Maybe tbc if people like it.<strong>

**R&R  
><strong>


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